Sentiments from a Grieving Mother

 

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I need you to know that I am not OK. I will never be OK. But I am different. I live in a new reality.

I don’t need sympathy.

I don’t need looks of pity.

I do need understanding.

I need YOU to understand that I am profoundly changed. I am altered for ever. And the bad days will come and go.

It’s okay with me that you cannot find the right words. Sometimes you can just say “I know you miss her. I know it must be difficult to continue living day in and day out, passing the milestones that she should be passing… without her. And it’s okay that you feel sad from time to time.”

I don’t need you to put me on suicide watch.

I don’t need you to feel sorry for me.

I need you to be with me.

And I need you to tell me about YOU too. What have I missed in your life while I have been buried in my own pain.

I need you to know that I want to be there for you too. Your troubles are not a burden to me. These things are not mutually exclusive. I am still your friend, daughter, sister, spouse… and I do not want to lose you. So trust me that I can handle it.

Sincerely,

A Grieving Mother

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